Healthy and Chic Life

"Adopting a new healthier lifestyle can involve changing diet to include more fresh fruit and vegetables as well as increasing levels of exercise." ~ Linford Christie

Good morning; afternoon; and evening friends and fans! Namaste. 🧘🏾‍♀️ Well, I had received some news from my primary care physician, Dr. Awwal, she was saying that my sugar level had gone up and she was saying that if I don't take Metformin, diabetes medication that I'd [eventually] take insulin. I remember my grandmother (my mother's mother) had to maintain her diabetes by using insulin and she outlived diabetes. I believe my mother is a diabetic and I'm not too sure what health issues were on my grandfathers side (my mother's father) but I know cataracts runs in the family since I'm of Asian (specifically Chinese) descent. My sister, Gwen and I may develop a case of getting cataracts later in life. This is going to suck when I have my random sweet tooth (yikes 😬) and if need be, I need to overall change my diet to reverse my diabetes. Okay, there's a lot swirling around in my mind between my own health issues with diabetes and news regarding Roe Vs. Wade being overturned. For the last several years, I've been doing my research regarding the vegan lifestyle and according to what I've watched on Netflix on reversing diabetes. I'm going to slowly ease myself into a vegan diet and will put my vegan cookbooks to good use! Be sure to check out my past blogs: Ethical Choices; A Foolproof Guide to Vegan or Not to Vegan; and this is my third blog on the vegan lifestyle. I suppose I'll list the documentaries regarding vegan. I've never been a huge fan of bacon (I can't stand the smell of bacon!), pork, and red meats. Nonetheless, from now until next blood work in mid October, I intend on going or rather steadily go on a vegan diet and I'm doing this for me because it's my personal choice of going vegan. I think the first video on Netflix people should watch is 'What the Health' and there are documentaries I should revisit since I've watched them once in the last several years. Health wise, I do want to make better food choices and even if I allowed myself at least one cheat day per week or twice a month. As I'm watching Neal Banard, MD | A Nutritional Approach for Reversing Diabetes on YouTube and it's a pretty interesting watch if you're looking a way around this, I mean reversing diabetes. If I have to, I'll begin with the 10-Day Green Smoothie Cleanse by JJ Smith and it's been a hot minute since I've made any smoothies from the book. At some point I'd have to invest in a blender and a water bottle or two so I can make two days worth of smoothies. At some point, I'll head to Target in Flushing at the SkyView Shopping Center since I'm more familiar with the layout of the store verses going to the Target in Washington Heights. Maybe I'm being picky but I feel more comfortable shopping there than any other Target location since I'm able to travel there by bus (the Q27 to Sanford Avenue, second to last stop in Flushing by the 7 train). I had gone to an orthopedic appointment earlier this month regarding my right knee and the orthopedic felt around my knee; he said it's Patellofemoral Pain Syndrome and referred me to physical therapy. It's very uncomfortable to walk, even up and down stairs. I had asked my primary care doctor to refer me to get some X-rays done and I plan on going on Monday after work. Hopefully I'll be able to do some yoga and whenever I do yoga, I feel more confident afterwards.

-Smoothie Cleanse-

"There are six components of wellness; proper weight and diet, proper exercise, breaking the smoking habit, control of alcohol, stress management and periodic exams." ~ Kenneth H. Cooper

Last time I did the 10-Day Green Smoothie Cleanse, I recall not craving as much sweets (once in a while I'll have a sweet tooth but not everyday like that) and perhaps if I could pull this off at least two weeks before my next blood work in October, I believe I should be okay. Maybe my other option is to make smoothies for an entire month before going for blood work in October and there had been times I've asked my doctor about smoothies, what I've been told "it wasn't necessary to make smoothies," what she was saying people in the European culture like in France, they're into making smoothies. Not exactly providing encouraging news and no wonder why many Americans are so unhealthy. I remember growing up in the 90's and people back then seemed like they took better care of themselves compared to the people these days in contrast to the lifestyles of people from the 70's and earlier where people prepared more home cooked meals more so at home than going out, I don't remember hearing people going to McDonald's but I could imagine people having home made meals more so than going out way before I was born. You'd often hear people who suffered from eating disorders, celebrities such as Paula Abdul; Princess Diana; Mary-Kate Olsen; Portia de Rossi; Karen Carpenter (I recently watched a documentary of her on YouTube recently); Calista Flockhart; Victoria [Posh Spice] Beckham; and just to name a few. I still have some frozen fruits in the freezer for roughly a year or more and I'm sure it's had enough of being frost bitten by now. Once when I invest in a new blender, I'll begin making my smoothies once when I visit places like Whole Foods for produce. I'm hoping that a vegan diet would ease my patellofemoral pain syndrome since the orthopedic diagnosed me with it earlier this month and will be going for physical therapy twice a week. For now, I need to take care of myself because my health comes first before anyone [and anything else] and if you don't like it, suck my dick [if I had one] and tell me what flavor. My health comes first before any man, woman and child; work and whomever and whatever. If you don't like it, oh well, too bad and you can go kick rocks, meaning go take a hike because I don't need you controlling me like you own me (I am not your property)! I'd have to do some research on how to relieve my knee and I'm always on my feet all the time. I'm so used to having somewhere to go.

-My Weight Loss Experience-

"Each of us should take personal responsibility for our diet, and our children's diet, and the government's role should be to make certain it provides the best information possible to help people stay healthy." ~ Jim Talent

I'm not going to lie but I've always struggled with my weight and during my junior year of high school, I was 165 pounds. The summer of 2000 when I worked at my first job at YWCA (a job I got through Summer Youth Employment Program for the summers of 2000 and 2001) when I worked at my first job, I lost weight. I cut down on soda; juice; and sweets. I only allowed myself one glass of juice in the morning and a bottle of soda per day. At lunch, I would have a Slim Fast and weight went down to 148 pounds and when school began back up in September of 2000, I recall my weight going back up to 155 pounds. When I was attending TCI: College of Technology for Graphic Design, I was roughly 140 pounds and there were times when I didn't always eat when I should have. I would somewhat starved myself and would eat every other day which was how I had lost weight more quickly. Only time I ate was when a few of my friends would order food and whatever they didn't want, they'd ask if I wanted their leftover food, I was given the rest of their food. Just before I was raped and got pregnant in 2009, I was 133 pounds early 2009 and at the time of my son's birth in November, I was 177 pounds and ever since 2009, my weight always hovered around 200 pounds. I've tried gym memberships but it wasn't for me because I knew I had to spend more money on top of my gym membership for a personal trainer and I need to try a different approach in a healthy way of losing weight and tone up my body. The last fitness spot I did was Better Body Bootcamp towards the end of 2019 because I was so looking forward to going to my cousin David's wedding in August of 2020 but the "pandemic" happened and I was so heartbroken and disappointed. Don't get me wrong, I'm very happy for my cousin but I wanted to be apart of something awesome (and amazing) and maybe it's not too late. I'll try my best to remain optimistic and hopeful. I lack the much needed confidence ever since my pregnancy and I don't feel as good as I should about myself. I've been very hard on myself about my weight and I don't feel as confident or sexy about myself. My next method is finding a yoga studio as a method of feeling good about myself because I've noticed whenever I do yoga, I feel amazing; sexy and confident after doing yoga at home. I'd have to learn to put myself first before anyone else (man, woman and child) and if you're one of those people that makes a big stink over people putting themselves first before you then there's something wrong with your way of thinking because from my perspective, if one doesn't take care of themselves first by keeping their health in check then how can anyone take care of you if your expectations are much too high for people to take care of you like a child? I need to take care of myself first and if people don't like it then I honestly don't know what to tell you. Anyone in their right mind would take it or leave it, simple as that. I have to learn to take it easy so I can focus more on my health than any other adult and it doesn't mean I'm heartless or selfish, it simply means that I'm taking the time out of my own schedule to make sure my health is in check so I can go to bed happy. It's going to be a process in itself but it's not going to be an easy journey on my end and a self-care blog may be somewhere in the near future because self-care is important as your own health; happiness; sanity; and mental health. I'm not looking to be that person who advocates for self-care but it is greatly encouraged and should be enjoyed to its fullest each day because tomorrow is never promised. There's a lot I need to learn because I want to live long enough to know that I've made things happen with positive encouragement from others. I'm still trying to figure things out and it's not easy but it's through trial and error, no need to rub certain things in my face because I am aware of the mistakes I've made in my own life (that I can promise you).

-Further Reading-

Several books I have on vegan lifestyle for those who are interested in changing their diet/eating habits. I'm not trying to convert people's eating habits but for those who are opened minded and open to trying something different or looking to leave their comfort zone.

• 10-Day Green Smoothie Cleanse by JJ Smith
• 7 Day Vegan Challenge: Featuring Over 70 Tasty Recipes and Menu Plans by Bettina Campolucci Bordi
• The 22-Day Revolution: The Plant-Based Program That Will Transform Your Body, Reset Your Habits, and Change Your Life by Marco Borges
• 125 Best Vegetarian Slow Cooker Recipes by Judith Finlayson
• Fresh from the Vegetarian Slow Cooker by Robin Robertson
• Flexitarian: Plant-Based Recipes With & Without the Meat
• Frugal Vegan: Affordable, Easy & Delicious Vegan Cooking by Kate Koteen & Kate Kasbee of Well Vegan

I should speak to one of my friends from my TCI days who is a fellow photographer and see if he can photograph me once when I'm able to either have my trusty sidekick Minolta X-370 repaired or purchase another Minolta camera for a mini photo shoot.

I need to put myself first and prioritize my health first before I pay attention to anyone else. Why should I put my health at risk for other peoples selfish reasons? Even if I need a day or two to myself, away from phone calls and spend time in solitude, it's something I'm going to eventually need at some point so I don't find myself crying. I am not afraid to spend time in solitude because I enjoy my own company before going home. Truth be told, I haven't given myself permission to cry and I'm sure people expect me to be happy 100% of the time. It's a freaking facade I'm putting on! I don't expect people to understand but I'm not going to explain why or the how, etc. How I'm feeling is something you can't fix and I personally feel it's something that has to come from within, nothing external can help other than speaking to a therapist regularly. Again, I don't expect people to understand and especially if you're the type who are so quick to blame others instead of holding yourself accountable. Sadly there are people who refuse to hold themselves accountable for their own health and always blame others for their own misfortune when it comes down to either health and/or wealth. One thing I sure need to work on is speaking up for myself and even if it angers or offends people, if you don't like it, you know where the door is and go kick rocks because I don't need you but don't come crawling back into my life saying you miss me, I hope by that time I'll have learned to love myself unconditionally (flaws and all 🥰).

Blessed be,

Jennifer

The Humble Lensman

"Photography is a way of feeling, of touching, of loving. What you have caught on film is captured forever... It remembers little things, long after you have forgotten everything." ~ Aaron Siskind

Good morning; afternoon; and evening friends and fans! Namaste. It's been a hot minute since I've posted anything photography related and I'm sure I'm going to get plenty of weird looks from non-photographers on why many of us actual photographers actually place 35mm or 120mm film in the refrigerator or freezer. I don't care what anyone says and I find it annoying having to explain exactly why photographers keep film in the fridge. For now I have to take it easy and rest my knee since I have Patellofemoral Pain Syndrome, according to my orthopedic in Great Neck earlier this month. Don't ask how I've injured my knee and will go back to watching 'Birth of the Dragon' on Netflix shortly. At this point, I hope this particular blog is informative in a way that it clears things up for the non-photographers with zero experience in handling photography so actual photographers aren't trying to "educate" the non-photographers on why we actually put film in the fridge out of sheer frustration and don't make me pimp slap you through the computer screen!!! Sit down and take some notes, if not, grab some chop sticks and catch some flies. Yeah, I'm using a Karate Kid movie reference, if you don't know how to use chop sticks, I don't know what to tell you non-Asians and you're lucky I'm unable to stab you in the eye with a chop stick at this point. I'm feeling very Bruce Lee mixed with Daniel LaRusso (the tournament scene from The Karate Kid - Daniel Vs Johnny in the tournament). I'm going to list several YouTube videos to view at your own leisure: What's in my Film Photography Fridge - How to Store film for film photography; What Film I Keep In My Fridge - Vlog What film is in my fridge (YouTube Cribs Edition); and How to store your photography film safely! Here are several blogs for you to read at your own leisure: Everything you need to know about refrigerating and freezing film; How to store film properly, and what happens when you don't; and Film Storage 101: How to store film before and after development for brilliant images. Nonetheless, I hope everyone understands why I've posted these articles and as well as several videos so you, the reader can have some type of understanding on why people in the photography field store film either in the freezer or refrigerator. No, we're not weird or odd or whatever term you wish to utilize.

-This May Sound Strange-

"A photographer went to a socialite party in New York. As he entered the front door, the host said, 'I love your pictures - they're wonderful; you must have a fantastic camera.' He said nothing until dinner was finished, then: 'That was a wonderful dinner; you must have a terrific stove.'" ~ Sam Haskins (🤣)

I'm so looking forward in going on my photography walks and generally when I go on my photography walks, I enjoy my own company so to speak and I hope people aren't offended when I say things like that. It helps clear my head from the stress and everyday life. Yet, I don't mind the company but I prefer going solo on my photography walks. Since my trusty sidekick, Minolta X-370 is currently out of commission, I'd have to find a camera to adopt and I usually treat my camera as if it was my own child because there is no asshole baby daddy involved with excuse after excuse or if you wish to use the term sperm donor with mental health issues and bullshit excuses or showing lack of interest in fatherhood whatsoever. The only time your camera "talks" back is when your camera refuses to cooperate so to speak and I still love my camera as if it were my child! At least I don't have to worry or stress myself out when it comes down to child support or anything of that sort. Anyway, I hope this blog is so far helpful with why many photographers who place their film [both used and not yet used] in the fridge and no, it's not film abuse (think child abuse) and like with writing, photography is my form of artistic therapy, artistic freedom, artistic expression or whatever you want to call it. I am very protective of my camera and the only people to handle my camera are fellow photographers. We're not weird just because the only we look at the world is different than how you view the world and maybe we look at the world from an artistic standpoint. Here is another article for you to read at your own leisure: Tips for storing photographic film... and it is not always in the refrigerator and as mentioned in a previous blog, I enjoy shooting film more so than digital. However, it would be much more economical to shoot digital verses shooting film. I have this Japan Camera Hunter 35mm Film Hard Case (Black, Holds 10 Rolls) in black and I also have an extra Japan Camera Hunter 35mm Film Hard Case but in red! Who knows, I may go back and purchase two additional film hard cases when I'm back at B&H for more film. Adorama have an awesome deal where you can buy in bulk, depending on what your budget is and which type of film you enjoy using. When I go on my photography walks, I already have an idea on where to go with my trusty sidekick and it's very soothing going on photography walks. It really is and if photography was never your thing, maybe you should try it sometime! 😉 I'm good in the hood with my Bose headset; good music from my Spotify playlist (depending on my mood at the moment); walking shoes; and plenty of film to last me for the day.

-Dreams or a Bust-

"To photograph is to hold one's breath, when all faculties converge to capture fleeting reality. It's at that precise moment that mastering an image becomes a great physical and intellectual joy." ~ Henri Cartier-Bresson, The Mind's Eye: Writings on Photography and Photographers

In regards of my plans of going back to LaGuardia Community College, for the moment, it seems like my plans of going back to college anytime soon will have to be placed on the back burner for now because I am not inoculated and I'd rather do the whole COVID-19 testing each week. Yes, it'll be annoying as fuck having to get tested each week but I refuse to get the vaccine and let me make mention of this, I don't trust the vaccine. If I have to, I'd have to review the information that Pinball Preparedness had sent me once when I had contacted him just before New Year's (2021) for the Religious Exemption that I needed for work since my job wanted everyone to get the arm ticket (vaccine). Check out Pinball Preparedness video titled: NO entitiy can LEAGALLY mandate the jab and OSHA says Employers who mandate the jab may be held liable for "any adverse reaction". I still have some hope left for being able to go back to college and when I graduate from LaGuardia Community College with an Associate's Degree, I am deciding which college to transfer to: Fashion Institute of Technology; The New School Parsons; International Center of Photography or New York Film Academy for a Bachelor's of Fine Arts in photography. While I'm a student at LaGuardia Community College (once when they lift the vaccine mandate), I want to give myself time to carefully decide which college to attend for photography and my goal is to go for a Bachelor's of Fine Arts as an undergraduate. At this point of where I'm at, I feel like college is my only ticket out of a minimum wage, dead end job and who knows if I could be wrong because I've heard people studying whatever they're studying in college, whether if it's engineering or whatever people are majoring in and when they graduate from college and they can't seem to find a job in their chosen field and then they're forced to go back to school and start from scratch. I'm hoping I wouldn't have this experience and I honestly have no other backup plans. Before the pandemic, I was considering in going to school to obtain a degree in photography; go back and study to be a teacher so I can teach photography in a high school (hopefully Intro to Photography or the history of photography) until I'm able to go back to study business so I can eventually open my own business. Sadly, there's a lot of math involved for this particular major and math is my kryptonite (I have a fourth grade math level). Nah, I'm going to skip the idea of business and I'm considering anything to do with crime scenes, something I've always had a fascination with for the last several years. Anything morbid I'm happy with. I'm sure there must be a coat school that offers photography courses here in New York City!

"A great photograph is a full of expression of what one feels about what is being photographed in the deepest sense and is thereby a true expression of what one feels about life in its entirety." ~ Ansel Adams

Blessed be,

Jennifer

The Preparedness Blueprint

"Because you never know when the day before... Is the day before. Prepare for tomorrow." ~ Bobby Akart

Good morning; afternoon; and evening friends and fans! Namaste. For the last several years I've been watching prepping channels and it's very informative information indeed. As of late or whenever time permits, I'll go on Amazon and take a peek-a-boo at what items are for prepping (as well as having a bug out bag on hand). More on the prepping channels in a moment while I'm trying to sort out my thoughts on what I want to say but don't get me wrong, I can be meticulous when it comes down to writing and photography and will list some of the channels I do watch at the moment. So far, I've purchased several items in the past year or so are LuckyNV Carry Travel Case Cover for LifeStraw in October 2021; Survival Vegetable Seeds Garden Ki Over 1,6000 Seeds Non-GMO and Heirloom; 30 Pieces 4 Sizes Mylar Bags Assorted Sizes 5 Mil Mylar Bags for Food Storage also in October 2021; The Ultimate Survival Medicine Guide: Emergency Preparedness for ANY Disaster by Joseph Alton, MD and Amy Alton, ARNP; Survival Kit, 220PCs Emergency Survival Gear First Aid Kit Mobile System Compatible Outdoor Survival Gear. I also recently ordered a 24 BattlePack Tactical Backpack. There are other items I may come back for when I have the available funds. I've also ordered Survival Vegetable Seeds Garden Kit over 1,600 Seeds Non-GMO and Heirloom, Great for Emergency Survival Gear, 35 Verities Seeds for planting Vegetables 35 Plant Markers Gardner's Basics. I'm slowly getting my bug out bag ready for when there's an emergency and will have to order several additional bug out bags for my son, Stephan. If you know of any retail stores here in New York City that I can check out and, in the meantime, I'm going to find any stores on my own. I'm a fan of having several different options than having very limited options and may have to find a bug out checklist to print out for my own records so to speak. I may have to get myself a new mountain bike since my bike currently have a flat tire, didn't have the bike for a month at the time of the flat tire and I have no way of getting my bike to Target in College Point for flat tire repairs. The next two Mylar Bags had been mentioned in either on The Angry Prepper or The Angry Truth channels on YouTube. These two Mylar Bags can be found on Amazon.

• 100 Pieces 5x7 inch Mylar Bags
• Mylar Bags for Food With Oxygen Absorbers
• OXYGONE 500 CC [100 Packets] Premium Oxygen for Food Storage, Oxygen Absorbers (pack of Absorbers.
  

-My YouTube Suggestions-

 "A community is like a ship; everyone ought to be prepared to take the helm." ~ Henrik Ibsen

Onto prepping channels on YouTube, there are several YouTubers I'm a fan of that I regularly watch from time to time. Several of them have at one point (once upon a time) served in the military and one of them I like because this dude is a natural speaker, he doesn't talk down to you or at you but does get you thinking and curious enough to look things up on the internet. The name of this dude's YouTube channel is Survival prepping for normal people and this October will mark two yeas since this guy posted any videos on YouTube. Another YouTuber is Black Scout Survival, I believe Mama Bear Prepping is another active military personal if I'm not mistaken. Another suggested YouTube channel is City Prepping; The Angry Prepper/The Angry Truth; Prepper Nation. They'll often mention Alaska Prepper in several of their videos or often times when they take the live stream route and another YouTube channel I watch is Pinball Preparedness. There are some of the YouTube channels I do watch and there's another YouTube channel, I forgot the name of this YouTube channel but I know it's a husband and wife team. I'm sure it'll come to me when I find out which channel I regularly watch will make mention of this particular YouTube channel but I'm not going to drive myself crazy trying to think of the channel. I often watch Poplar Preparedness and any other channel on YouTube, best to click on the hashtags in the description part of the video (yeah, I know, such a millennial thing to do but I don't get the whole point of in or the significance of these hashtags). It's been a hot minute since I've watched Sensible Prepper or Survival Dispatch, The Urban Prepper. That YouTube channel I was trying to break my head over is Full Spectrum Survival! Just know that when we end up in a Shit Hits The Fan scenario that no one will come to save you and just think of The Walking Dead, there may be a separate blog about what I've learned what to avoid; a general idea of what could go wrong and what could go right. I'm currently up to season nine of The Walking Dead on Netflix and there's another zombie themed show on Netflix I've watched but sucks that it's only five seasons of Z Nation. [Side note: You may recognize Christian Serratos from The Walking Dead, she plays the character Rosita Espinosa and she's done two seasons of Selena: The Series on Netflix.] Another zombie show I'm watching is Black Summer (currently up to season two) and another zombie related show I've never gotten past episode one is Reality Z on Netflix (Reality Z is mostly in Spanish, I'm a non speaking Spanish Latina). Okay, I'm getting a bit carried away with zombie related shows but these are a whole other blog in itself. I've found another YouTube movie titled 'Prepper | FREE FULL COMEDY MOVIE | End of the World Comedy Drama Movie'. There's a reason why I've put the preppers who are currently serving in the military but haven't come across any preppers whom are police officers. I'm sure there are active police officers who are preppers. One of these YouTube channels have mentioned where to stock up on food: Nutrient Survival and as well as stocking up on medicine: Contingency Medical.

-Electromagnetic Pulse-

"Victory at all costs, victory in spite of all terror, victory however long and hard the road may be; for without victory, there is no survival." ~ Winston Churchill

If anyone knows of any items for an EMP attack (Electromagnetic Pulse), I'm all ears and open to checking out items. I'd have to find some faraday bags, as well as faraday cages and making sure I have all my devices protected. I hope I wouldn't have to experiences this my lifetime and if need be, I should stock up on novels from Anne Rice or any other novels if in the event of an EMP attack. Stock up on what you need now, even if it's a little bit at a time until you have a good ten years worth of food, books, and entertainment (such as board games, card games such as Uno! Dominoes, whatever you may have on hand for you and your family). Here is a reading suggestion for you to read: 'How To Defend Against The Electromagnetic Pulse Threat By Literally Painting Over It' and 'DHS Combats Potential Electromagnetic Pulse (EMP) Attack'. Best to be prepared for anything that life throws at us and I don't trust the government since I feel they have something devious up their sleeves. I'm hoping to keep this type of blog in three blogs, meaning there may be two future blogs about prepping and I have not yet decided whether if there will be two additional blogs on prepping. Best to be prepared with anything from books to games and anything to keep yourselves occupied. If you're not much of a writer, pick up the habit of writing and always have several copies of dictionaries on hand since you may not be able to use your phones to look up whatever words you're looking for on your phone. Personally, I find people to be spoiled with their phones.

-Shortages-

"Recent research shows that many children who do not have enough to eat wind up with diminished capacity to understand and learn. Children don't have to be starving for this to happen. Even mild under nutrition - the kind most common among poor people in America - can do it." ~ Carl Sagan

It's bad enough there's baby formula shortages on hand in many retail stores and now we're facing another. Here's a reading suggestion: 'National Tampon Shortage Is Affecting American Women - and No One Knows When It Will End' and 'The FDA is facing an investigation into its handling of the baby formula shortage'. I'm going to be honest, I'm grateful that I don't have an infant to care for at the moment because I don't have to worry about how the baby will be fed, etc. If we're currently facing all these shortages out there on store shelves, I'd suggest stock up on diapers of different sizes so you'd be best prepared for what's to come and I know this sounds insane but I'm sure somewhere in your subconscious mind you know I'm right. Even if you have to go to BJ's Wholesale Club or even Costco Wholesale for things like garbage bags, shampoo/conditioner, bath soap, and whatever else you feel you need to stock up on. For freeze dry food, I wish I could suggest which freeze dry foods are good because I have not [yet] ordered any freeze-dried foods. Perhaps you can order small amounts from Amazon and see which ones you fancy. I wouldn't know too much about things like freeze dried foods since I have zero experience with trying freeze dried foods.

 

https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/tag/preppers

Blessed be,

Jennifer

Spiritual Practice

"Enlightened leadership is spiritual if we understand spirituality not as some kind of religious dogma or ideology but as the domain of awareness where we experience values like truth, goodness, beauty, love and compassion, and also intuition, creativity, insight and focused attention." ~ Deepak Chopra

Good morning; afternoon; and evening friends and fans. Namaste. I've been interested in witchcraft since high school but never did anything with witchcraft until recently and I've felt intimidated by it back then. Nowadays, I hold zero intimidation towards Wicca and I'm more open to the experience these days. I realize there are dire consequences, whether if your intentions are positive or negative and always keep that in mind at all times when performing any specific spiritual work of any kind. Keep in mind that whatever energy you put out there in the universe, whether if it's something positive or negative, that same energy will come back to you threefold. For example, if you do good such as being honest and giving back to the universe then that same energy will bless you times three. If you do negative harm to others then that same negative energy will return to you times three. For example, if you rob someone at gun/knife point then that same negative energy will return to you threefold. Same goes if you rape someone and that same energy will return to you in some type of way, whether if you're a father of a daughter or if it were to happen to your mother; aunt; [female] cousin whom you may be close with or even your grandmother! That wouldn't feel very good, would it [if the shoe was on the other foot]? Throughout this blog, I may include certain personal experiences, suggestions or even hypothetical scenarios on what do and what not to do before, during and after each spiritual ritual you choose to perform. There are four YouTube channels I watch whenever time permits: Witch of Wonderust; Magical Witch; Magical Crafting; and Spells8. These I will suggest watching first, depending on your current situation at the moment and my suggestion is to nip it in the butt right away! More about that situation later in the blog and I will admit it is very satisfying as a result but it took a while to manifest into reality. Take your time and have patience while doing candle magic. I will suggest Original Botanica on Webster Avenue in the Bronx [New York] for what you need: Candle and oil purposes, depending what your main intentions are at the moment. If Original Botanica is out of the question due to your [work] schedule, Enchantments in the East Village but be sure to contact them for their store hours either on Facebook or Instagram. Crystal wise: Namaste Bookshop and Aum Shanti Bookshop & Psychic Tarot Card Readings. When dealing with the moon phases for a specific spiritual outcome, check out Moon Giant Calendar and plan accordingly to your candle magic. Check out Parlour of Wonders blog ['Candle Spells How-To Guide'] since the person explains candle colors, when to light your candle; working with moon phases; working with astrological phenomena; working with days of the week; and just to name a few. Another spiritual suggestion, always sage everything, candles, oils, sachet powders and crystals or whatever you're working on at the moment.

-Spiritual Divination-

"...But we also believe that part of our mission is to find our bliss and follow it. Life is a precious and delicate gift. How much of that gift do we squander out of fear?" ~ Dianne Sylvan, The Body Scared.

When it comes to spiritual divination such as tarot cards, I have several tarot card decks and two oracle cards. The three tarot cards decks I have are Amazon and the two oracle cards are from Namaste Bookshop. If you're looking for a tarot card table cloth, I have this awesome table cloth for tarot card reading from Amazon if you're looking to read for other people or for yourself (either way is fine). I've bought a Tarot Card Holder Moon Tray Crystal Holder for Stones, Crystal Necklace Holder, Crystal Storage for Rune Stones, Crystal Organizer, Tarot Card Case to Hold All Your Alter Supplies; Witchy Cauldron Tarot Divination, Table Cloth for Reading and Alter Cloth Moon Alter, Cloth Witchy Emridery Velvet Silk Touch Satin Celtic Cross. If you're looking to get carving tools for candles, I have an 8 Pieces Wax Carving Tool Stainless Steel Wax Carvers Tools Spatula Chisel Wax Clay Sculpting Tool Spoon Carving Tool for Wax Oil Candle Statuary Clay Tools (Silver). If you have a tarot card deck but looking for a case for your tarot card deck, I have Luck Lab Leather Tarot Card Case/Holder) Grey - for Most Standard Size Tarot Cards - Moon Design and I also have a black tarot card case but this time with the sun design. Luck Lab Leather Tarot Card Case/Holder - Black - for Most Standard Size Tarot Cards - Sun Design as a spare case to have on hand. When I do tarot card readings for other people, I use Dionysus Classic Design Tarot Cards Deck with Guidebook I had purchased from Amazon in 2020 and when I do personal tarot card readings, I use The Modern Witch Tarot Deck for personal readings and I personally love this deck. I also have Keepers of the Light Oracle Cards and Archangel Oracle Cards: A 44-Card Deck and Guidebook. From the times I've done a personal [tarot] reading, they've came back accurate and I also done a [tarot] reading for a neighbor a year ago, he has mentioned the reading is accurate with what was going on in his life. My Best advice is to feel out every tarot and/or oracle card deck of your choosing. Every card selection is a very unique experience per person. I know this all sounds very weird to those who lack understanding of tarot cards. This is another suggested reading, I have How to Read Tarot: A Practical Guide and it's a hard cover book I purchased at Barnes & Noble in Union Square for $8 bucks before tax. I believe using tarot cards for the greater good. There are people who may not be aware that they are a witch or a warlock and roughly ten months ago I found two videos (both are part one and the second is of course a part two) on YouTube and both are to be viewed at your leisure. 7 Reasons Why You Might Be a Witch and Not Even Know It... and 7 Reasons Why You Might Be a Witch and Not Even Know It - Part 2 both are interesting videos to watch. I'm the kind of person who enjoys being outdoors more so than feeling like a prisoner within the four walls of home! Since I'm a New York residence, the winter months are different but I'm not crazy about being stuck at home.

• The Complete Book of Black Magic and Witchcraft: Including the rituals of Ceremonial Magic, Exorcism, True Sorcery and Infernal Necromancy by Shadow Books
  
• The Complete Guide to Astrology: Understanding Yourself, Your Signs, and Your Birth Chart by Louise Eddington
• Psychic Empath: Secrets of Psychic and Empaths and a Guide to Developing Abilities Such as Intuition, Clairvoyance, Telepathy, Aura Reading, Healing Mediumship, and Connecting to Your Spirit Guides by Spiritual Awakening Academy
  

-Spiritual Practice-

 "We are not evil. We don't harm or seduce people. We are not dangerous. We are ordinary people like you. We have families, jobs, hopes, and dreams. We are not a cult. This religion is not a joke. We are not what you think we are from looking at T.V. We are real. We laugh, we cry. We are serious. We have a sense of humor. You don't have to be afraid of us. We don't want to convert you. And don't try to convert us. Just give us the same right we give you -- to live in peace. We are much more similar to you than you think." ~ Margot Adler

Last but not least, as mentioned before when it comes down to certain situations such as friendships and in a particular blog titled, With Friends Like You, Who Needs Enemies! If you are aware of a shift in your friendship, I suggest either speaking to the other people you have a close association with but if you notice a shift in their behavior, I suggest nip it in the butt right away and use the Waning Moon phase to get rid of any negativity. Another book suggestion is Power of the Psalms by Anna Riva you can purchase at Original Botanica in the Bronx or even Amazon and they have almost every psalm you can think of in the book! However, if you want the said individual to relocate elsewhere, purchase a 7 Day Pull Out Candle Brown that you can pull out; carve the individual's name and date of birth onto the candle, use Open Road Oil; Open Road Sachet Powder; Attraction Oil; Attraction Sachet Powder; Chasing Oil; Get Out Oil; Get Out Sachet Powder; other oils you feel are completely necessary to use for that moment in time; and psalms picked out from Power of the Psalms book for the said individual to find a new dwelling, however, results may vary (meaning, certain spells may happen sooner than others and others may take several weeks, months or so, depending on how strong of an intent you have from within). Set your intentions for the said individual to relocate, whether if it's somewhere in Europe so you wouldn't have to ever see the said individual ever again! The further, the better for the both of you since it'll be a change of scenery for the both of you if the other person moved to Europe. I had performed this spell on an ex friend, Nargiss and she and her son, Amen and as I've learned several months ago that they're relocating to Atlanta, Georgia at the end of June! 😁 I'm very proud of myself for putting my energy into my ex friend to relocate. I may as well forgive this chick, Pamela and I'm pretty sure by now she's brainwashed into believing that I'm a horrible person for sending that email in November of 2020. [They can be angry all they want that I spoke the truth about themselves and if I could do it all over again, I would've taken my time with what I wanted to say so everything would be all in one email on what I want to say.] If I could have done things very differently, I would have done so and would have been less nervous about Nargiss coming by when I'm not home had I nipped it right in the butt so she wouldn't chit chat with my mother. I will say this once but this chick think she's slick by coming around when I'm not home (specifically when I'm at work and I have to hear it from my son when I get home). Maybe my mind is overreacting as always. Well, the damage is already done and over with but if I ever found myself in a similar situation where there's a shift in my friendship, I would nip it in the butt right away instead of waiting until after sending the email saying what I have to say in hopes the individual would relocate to Europe for life then send the email. I'm just speaking on hypothetical terms if I ever saw myself in a similar situation where there's a shift in the friendship.

"The practice of magic is not evil or destructive -- Witches and folk magicians, through timeless rituals, are only drawing upon natural energies found within the earth and our bodies to create positive, life-affirming change." ~ Scott Cunningham, The Truth About Witchcraft Today

I've watched 'Protection Magick' by The Witch of Wonderlust and there's items I'd have to eventually purchase either from Amazon or from a spiritual shop to make protection magick with the ingredients listed in the video. I'm very curious on how this will turn out once when I have everything, I need to make the protection magick. You can check out this video, How to Make Black Salt - Protection Magic - Witches Black Salt Recipe, Magical Crafting - Witchcraft by Magical Crafting.

• Black Lava Hawaiian Sea Salt - 2lb. Bag Fine Grain by San Francisco Salt Company;
• Activated Charcoal Capsules - 1,200 mg Highly Absorbent Helps Alleviate Gas & Bloating Promotes Natural Detoxification Derived from Coconut Shells - per Serving - 100 Vegan Capsules;
• Cast Iron Cauldron w/handle, ideal for smudging, incense burning, ritual purpose, decoration, candle holder, etc. (4" Diameter Handle to Handle, 2.5" Inside Diameter);
• Instant Light Hookah Shisha Charcoal, Charcoal Tablets for Incense - 1 Box, 4 Rolls, 40 Tablets;
• Pure and Organic Biokoma Rue Dried Herb - Natural Tea in Resealable Pack Moisture Proof Pouch - 50g;
• Anthony's Organic Dried Rosemary Leaves, 1 lb., Whole Leaf, Destemmed, Non GMO, Non-Irradiated, Gluten Free 
•  Ripple Stream Mugwort herb Pure Leaves Fine Picked Bulk Nil Stem, Stalk, Organic Artemisia vulgaris Chemical Free 4 ounce (Organic) 
• Premium California White Sage 4 Inch Smudge Sticks - Torch Wands Home Cleansing, Fragrance, Meditation, Yoga, Blessing, Smudging Rituals, New Home (6 Pack)
• Govinda Frankincene Natural Resin Pea Size 1 lb. 
• Stone Mortar and Pestle Natural by Divine
  

I had purchased this clear skull jar (not sure how to describe it in writing but will eventually take a picture of it and post it on here when time permits) from Enchantments in the East Village sometime last year at their old location before they had relocated early February 2022. My main intention with this particular item is to use it for Black Salt. There's a video titled: 'How to Make Black Salt - Protection Magic - Witches Black Salt Recipe, Magical Crafting - Witchcraft' by Magical Crafting. If you're currently searching for employment opportunities at the moment, I've found a spell for '"New Job" Prosperity Bowl' by HerbWicc on Tumbler. Crystals you'll need are Tigers Eye; Aventurine; Pyrite; Citrine; and Clear Quartz. Best of luck to those who are on their job search for something better and something to assist in paying your bills and putting food on the table for you and your family! Side note: If you want the candle magick to work wonderfully, best to use a Selenite Crystal to charge up your candles and/or crystals you may have on hand. For further reading, here is an article on 'How To Use Selenite For Deep Energetic Cleansing, From Crystal Experts' and best to Google search whatever crystals may catch your attention whenever you're looking to get crystals from spiritual shops in your area!

-Miscellaneous Finds-

• Banishing Return to Sender Spell / Breaking the Curse Part 2
• 'Powers of the Orishas: Santeria & the Worship of Saints' by Migene Gonzalez Wippler
• 'The Witch's Alter: The Craft, Lore & Magicka of Sacred Space' by Jason Mankey and Laura Tempest Zakroff
• What Everyone Ought To Knows About Spiritual Experience
• The Strange Reality of Religion
  

 Treat others as how you want to be treated.

Blessed be,

Jennifer

With Friends Like You, Who Needs Enemies!

Dear "Friend" who Betrayed me,

Good morning; afternoon; and evening Nargiss and Pamela! Namaste. 🙏🏾 How are you? Before I say anything else, I want you to know that I love you. I have always loved you and I will never stop. I need to tell you that I am grateful. I am grateful for all the wonderful memories that created amazing friendship we once had. I will never forget the days at the beach, or the countless hours drinking tea and chatting about this, that and whatever else. I will remember the parties and crazy evenings spent with you.

From the bottom of my heart, I want to thank you for all the times that you saved me from myself. When I needed someone to vent to, you were there. You would listen, and you would tell me that I was being an idiot, or that I was not. I want to thank you wholeheartedly for the hours spent trying to pull me out of dark places in my mind. Thank you for the lengthy conversations we had. Thank you for telling me how much you cared when I thought nobody did. I am endlessly grateful for your persistent attempts to support me when all I did was push you away. I know I didn't always show it, but I appreciated it more than you will ever know.

 

It is all these things that have instilled an everlasting love and admiration for you in my heart, but it is not enough to keep our friendship intact. You hurt me. You hurt me at a time when I didn't think I could hurt any more. You treated me like gold, you built up my trust, and then you smashed it into a million pieces when I was most vulnerable. You turned your back on me when I needed you, and for that I will never forgive you. I truly believe that you do not understand how much pain you caused, and I hope you never do. I hope you never have to experience the guilt of knowing what you have put me through. I know that you are a good person, and that your actions were unintentional, but that does not make it any less painful for me.

Our friendship is over now, and that void will never be filled. There is no going back, but I need you to know that I will always support you from afar. I will always wish good things for you, and should you ever need a shoulder to cry on, mine will always be there for you. If anyone asks me about you, I will have nothing but kind words to share. You hurt me, and I will never forget that, but that is nothing in comparison to the amazing impact you've had on my life. So this is goodbye, goodbye and thank you. Thank you for being you, and thank you for making me, me.

I would like to say that I can see us being friends again in the future but that'll be a lie. It would never be the same again and if I happen to see you one day, I'll smile and walk away. And although, my heart will break a little and memories will hit me like a train, I'll be grateful for the times that we spent together.

They say that, some people just aren't meant to stay in your life forever unfortunately, you were one of those people. But they also say that, some people come into your life to teach you a lesson and leave, but the most important ones leave a mark.

Well, you left a mark on me, and I am grateful that you came into my life, when you did.

I also know that you may never see this but, I just needed to get it off my chest. There was a lot left unsaid, a lot I wish I could've said. So, I guess I'm writing this to get some closure, for myself.

I sincerely hope that, you and your family are doing well. I wish you get everything you want from your life, and more.

Know that you'll always hold a place in my heart.

This is a letter to you to say a few things I didn't get to say previously. No, this isn't here to bash you or list reasons why I hate you. Because to clarify, I don't hate you at all. In fact, I still have a place in my heart just for you and our memories. So keep in mind, if you ever see me out one day, say hi to me. Cause there was once a time when we would've looked forward to seeing each other. Now, here's the real kicker and best part of the blog! Nargiss, if you're claiming that I am being "childish," learn to say it to my face and only milquetoasts sit behind technology and resort to name calling. How very mature of the both of you to talk shit about me behind my back instead of speaking to me first for my side of the story. LOL... You were supposed to always look out for me - but then you were talking behind my back. However, I realize I may not be able to prove that you both are talking shit about me behind my back but I am going to go with my first instinct and as the saying goes, your first instinct is NEVER wrong! What's even more childish is that I would not be shocked if you and Pamela are talking shit about me behind my back instead of being "adults" about this situation. Now, who's being infantile? Yet, you accuse me of not being "adult" enough when in reality the both of you are doing the same exact thing behind my back by talking about me. Conspiring against me along with my own mother, Shiu, is never a positive sign, especially since my mother doesn't have any friends in her own age group so out of sheer desperation and most likely out of fear of being alone in a friendless way; nonetheless, she steals my friends who are within my age group but how mature of my mother as well. Moreover, the sad reality is that I know I will never be good enough for my own mother for all of the personal reasons I am mentioning this and in the end I know she loves my sister, Gwen more than she will ever love me. I'm a fiercely loyal person, and I will do everything in my power to keep a friendship alive. That is, until I have been hurt too many times and need to withdraw for my own sanity and protection, or until life's wind blows too hard and I am forced to let go in comparison to those who are two-faced; hypocrites; backstabbing; pompous; ungrateful; jaundiced; ignorant; conniving; manipulative; stool pigeon; egocentric; captious; and yet condescending assholes in the world... I'm not insulting you. I'm just describing you. Oh no, no, no sweetheart, you both have it all twisted, I refuse to pull the victim card and give you both the mental; emotional; psychological; and most importantly, the spiritual satisfaction but learn to get your facts straight next time before talking all that childish nonsense about people! I'm much too classy to fall for such act of yours. You play the victim. I'll play the disinterested bystander. How would you both like it if the shoe was on the other foot and I did that to you? What would you say and what would you do if I did that to you? Let it be granted that both of you would be fucking pissed! Right? Now you know what I mean, would you say that I am two-faced; hypocrite; backstabbing motherfucker? For instance: Pamela, would you want me to go behind your back and tell your mother that you need to pay rent; the electric bill; and etc.? And that she should begin preparing your funeral because of your ex? Now with that Order of Protection simply does NOT ACT as a bullet proof vest for jack shit because it will only motivate men with such violent mindset so much more to commit murder and exes can always find ways to commit homicide without blood being on their hands! How would you know if he's not going to hire a hit-man dressed in a United States Postal worker uniform or even a FedEx delivery person and point a gun at your head, pull the trigger killing you instantly right then and there once when you open the front door and go right after Johnathan? People are very clever and super creative if they play their cards right and still get away with murder! In the end, I hope you are fully aware that people can find just about anything on Amazon these days and just be mindful of that! Take my colleague from Staples, James' wife and daughter were both brutally raped and murdered by his wife's ex-boyfriend... Oh, did I mention weapon of choice of the ex-boyfriend, it was a hammer? James mentioned that there is not a day that goes by that he doesn't think about ending his own life. Another way to harm people is through brujería; Santería or Voodoo/Hoodoo and all your ex needs is something that belongs to you such as hair, a picture of you and your date of birth or whatever he can get his hands on at the moment (keep that in mind as future reference and you'll thank me later), depending which direction he's heading towards. There are ways to spiritually protect yourself and if your ex believes in dark magick, then he'd be spending a fortune on making your life very, very miserable by going to a bruja or doing this himself. Be very vigilant of people who are into dark magick because they want what you have and I have no intentions of harming you whatsoever through brujería, unless you cause me harm first then I'll do what it takes to protect myself. I am not done yet because I'm just getting started!!! Nargiss, would you want me to go to your parents behind your back and tell your family that you're not a virgin and how you were raped at the age of 12 or 13? Let's. 👏🏾 Not. 👏🏾 Get. 👏🏾 It. 👏🏾 Twisted! 👏🏾 There had been several times when you've mentioned that you wished your parents would divorce and you can't backtrack on what you've said in conversation because that's what you've mentioned in a past conversation. I was going to purchase a Back-To-Back Separation Candle Black; and several oils [Break Up Oil; Separation Oil; Break Up Sachet Powder; and Separation Sachet Powder] from Original Botanica or there's always that option of them Separate Custom Big Al Candle but now that I think about it, I have completely changed my mind because you are on your own with that! All you need are your parents full names; date of birth; and a picture of them together for the spell. As the saying goes, be careful in what you wish for because your wish will eventually be granted. Do your parents even realize they're living proof that two wrongs don't make a right? Don't be ashamed of who you are. That's your parents' job. I can't help imagining how much more awesome the world would be if your dad had just pulled out earlier. Life is like chess, and I don't always have to announce my next move to either one of you or to anyone else because I don't have to answer to neither one of you. I don't keep secrets; I just keep people out of my business. My business isn't your business. Unless you're a thong, don't be up my ass. Yeah, most people just love to insult my intelligence because people have nothing better to do with their time [and energy] since they're so miserable with their own lives, people will do anything [and everything] in their power to make my life so very miserable and I am not as incompetent as I look because I am a lot smarter than I look (looks can be very deceiving) ... However, instead of accusing me of being a liar, when you were with José and he got you pregnant. Before you even told me that you had the baby aborted, you went on Facebook and lied that you had a "miscarriage" due to "stress" between José and yourself with that level of conflict. For some reason, I had a feeling you had the baby aborted until you came out and told me confirming what my instincts were already telling me. Now Nargiss, since you failed to provide any legitimate examples (three at most) of how I'm being negative, so therefore, your accusations tend to be: tedious; ineffectual; void; very inconsistent; irrelevant; ignorant; sneaky; conniving; very condescending of you; total bullshit; and extremely preposterous. Unless your name is Google, stop acting like you know everything! You know what Nargiss, you should become a comedian someday! People say that laughter is the best medicine... your face must be curing the world. Too bad you can't Photoshop your ugly personality. Why don't you pick up your own dirty laundry before you complain about mine!!! Don't throw stones at my glass house when you live in a glass house as well. Which I can knock down with just one stone! With friends like you, who needs enemies. By the way Nargiss, nice try getting Donald to conspire against me and as I've mentioned before, I know you so desperately want that satisfaction of me talking about you behind your backs to Donald. Bravo, bravo Nargiss! 👏🏾 (*Standing ovation is much needed at this point!*) You'd be in good shape... if you ran as much as your mouth. Your ass must be pretty jealous of all the shit that comes out of your mouth. Life is full of disappointments, and I just added you to the list, Nargiss. By the way, my tolerance for idiots is extremely low today. I used to have some immunity built up but obviously there is a new strain out there. Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth. As for my mother, I don't agree with what she had done and it's an unforgivable act of behavior on her end because she is in the wrong for what she had done. This is not normal behavior to befriend someone who is old enough to be her daughter and you know as well as I do, she is in need of deep psychological assistance something awful whether if you choose to openly admit it or not. Do not include my mother in on our fight! I personally don't find this behavior at all normal to befriend someone who is old enough to be your own mother and besides, what could she have in common with someone who is old enough to be her daughter anyway? No, I'm not hating on anyone because I have better things to accomplish than be around people who stab others in the back and laugh about it in the process. This is not my mother's fight (and you know it...) and if you're going to include my mother in on this, where in the world does she fit in this equation, Nargiss? Riddle me that because I can't seem to figure it out! If you can't come up with an honest reasonable response than do not include my mother in on this since it's the three of us, as in you, Pamela and I and no one else. Please get that through your thick head, Nargiss and quit wasting my time with trying to get my mother involved when it's none of her concern whatsoever. I would totally understand that the only available option to have my mother involved with this is if I was abusing controlled substance such as drugs and/or alcohol then it would be logical and yet understandable in staging an intervention. Since I am not abusing drugs or alcohol then it should result in zero excuses as to have my mother involved with this when it's none of her concern whatsoever. All in all, you both have no idea who you are messing with! 😏 Don't you get tired of putting makeup on your two faces every morning, Nargiss? Keep rolling your eyes. Maybe you'll find a brain back there. If it looks like I give a damn, please tell me. I don't want to give off the wrong impression.

You said some brutal, heartless things to me, which really crushed me. I loved you so much. But there were misunderstandings. Life became a competition, mutual friends took sides, and even being friends with others seemed to be a competition with you. Then it was almost like others took our places in each others lives. Then in the end, I had to pull away from you more. How else was I supposed to react when you stabbed me in the back? I know you thought what I said was unfair and unfeeling. But would you listen to me when I tried to explain? No. But I wish you had. We could have reasoned with each other. I would never have tried to hurt you or do anything unfair or unkind in our friendship. But why did you have to backstab me??? I guess I will never know. But I need you to know that I was devastated by what happened. We are not friends, and we are not even acquaintances. Let's not pretend like we don't know each other. I couldn't tell you when, and I couldn't tell you why or how, but one day I knew our friendship was coming to an end. A year ago, I would've blamed others, I even would have blamed you. But to be quite frank, I don't think anyone is to blame. I truly believe that life ran its course and we exhausted what we had to offer each other. I thank Yahuah that He showed us that things really do happen for a reason, and that we should always trust the process. I wish the both of you the best of luck on this journey in life, may it be mentally; emotionally; physically; [definitely] psychology; and yet spiritually.

I want to start by saying that I hate the term "ex" best friend. I think it's pretty dramatic if we are being honest. I think the reason that term fits here, however, is simple. We aren't friends anymore. We don't associate, and we don't even follow each other on social media. Gasp, I know.

I hate how things ended between us. I feel like neither of us ever said bye to each other, and I'm always going to be upset about that. If I'm being honest, I'm still a little mad at how our friendship stopped. I don't have any hard feelings towards you personally, but I can't believe how you just let me go so quickly, and how you haven't reached out to me in over a year. You made me feel like everything about our friendship meant nothing to you, and that really hurts me.

And even though we are no longer friends, I just want you to know that I could never hate you. Trust me, I've tried. It sounds awful, but I thought it would be easier to get over losing you if I could hate you - but I couldn't bring myself to do it. I was hurt when you left, but I will never hate you. You were my best friend. And despite how things ended up, because of that, I will always love you.

Friendships are a two-way street; I felt as though I was traveling down a one-way dead-end lane. You became so absorbed in your own life that you forgot to appreciate the friendship I was so carefully cultivating.

I understand that each friendship is unique. Some friends are there to get you through a finite period of time. Some friendships last a lifetime.

I am a damn good friend. I will be there in good times and bad. I always give more than I receive. I deserve someone who appreciates and respects me. Am I perfect? Absolutely not. But as with all relationships, friendships have highs and lows. You have to learn to stick it out when times get tough.

I hope you find happiness in life. But I encourage you to take more time to appreciate the friendships you find value in. Because the moment you stop trying is the moment your relationships will suffer.

And one day, part of me hopes you regret the fact that you let our friendship die.

This letter isn't to shame you for our past, but I hope it serves as a reminder to never take the people in your life for granted. Because one day they'll realize they deserve more.

If you care about someone and value their friendship, tell them. Show them. They deserve to know.

Betrayal taught me not to be so open and so giving to people who don't deserve it. It taught me to be a little more guarded. I'm still FRIENDLY, but now I have BOUNDARIES. It taught me that I don't need to like everyone and not everyone needs to like me.

I realized that I can't change people. Feeling sorry and remorse comes from within. In life, you will deal with people who, no matter what, will not admit for being wrong. Unfortunately, you will deal with people who just don't care about your feelings and have no regard for your emotions.

I also have learned to appreciate the people in my life who are REAL, GENUINE and have proven to have my best interest at heart. I am thankful for all the LOYAL people in my life, and I have learned to not care about the "FAKE" people who were just part of my life, TEMPORARILY.

I want to thank you for showing me that I shouldn't have to question our friendship. I'm done hearing you talk about other people and then act like you're their friend, all the while wondering if you're doing the same to me. A true friend is one that I can trust implicitly.

Lastly, I want to thank you for helping me understand that losing a best friend isn't the end of the world. That I can move on and be happy. That there are people out there that do care for me and are my true friends. I do hope you figure out what you're looking for and eventually find it.

"Fake friends believe in rumors. Real friends believe in you." ~ Yolanda Hadid

Good night and sweet dreams when you go to bed tonight. By the way, "How have you been sleeping?" ~ Bonnie and you may want to be careful on who you're dealing with next time, if there's a next time!

Thank you for your consideration. Take care, I'll love you forever, Your ex best friend.

Sincerely,

Jennifer, The amazing friend you let go

P.S. QUALITY MATTERS MORE THAN QUANTITY WHEN IT COMES TO FRIENDS.

Update: New York City Five Borough Tour

"Art is what we call... the thing an artist does.

It's not the medium or the oil or the price or whether it hangs on a wall or you  eat it. What matters, what makes it art, is that the person who made it overcame the resistance, ignored the voice of doubt and made something worth making. Something risky. Something human.

Art is in the... eye of the beholder. It's in the soul of the artist." ~ Seth Godin

Good morning; afternoon; and evening friends and fans! Namaste. 👋 I know this blog is mostly about photography and I hope to keep it that way or unless if it's something important, I'm not saying that my previous blogs aren't important. Okay, as I'm here writing this blog listening to some music on Spotify [specifically, Music for Writing playlist for now] and once when I'm done with this, I'll watch some videos on YouTube on photography since it's been a hot minute since I've watched anything pertaining to photography and in recent months I've been watching The Angry Prepper/The Angry Truth; A Call For An Uprising; Prepper Nation; and several others, it's been a while since I've watched the Canadian Prepper or Blackscout Survival. At any rate,  I wanted to write something that isn't a scary bedtime story that we've been hearing so much about in recent months about this nonsense about the Coronavirus; a majority of us know that this is some fucking bullshit to keep families apart and it's nothing but the flu. The more I think about it, the more annoyed and pissed off I get and having my monthly friend isn't helping in any kind of way. I need to take my mind off of the fake COVID-19 and Omicron (B.1.1.529). I'm just annoyed with everything going on but enough on that and just to make this clear, I am not vaccinated regarding my own personal reasons why. I suppose for my own comfort sake, I've seen several people use this 'Cool Protection Stand - 3D Mask Bracket - Face Mask Inner Support Frame - Plastic Brackets - More Space for Comfortable Breathing Protect Lipstick Washable Reusable' and it looks a bit more comfortable than having this mask smothering you and making it impossible to even breath or speak properly in these masks.

Just to let you all know that I am cootie free! I know I sound like I'm in grade school but people will not care if you're COVID-19 free and I'm tired of people asking me if I've gotten the vaccine. Already made up my mind, not getting the vaccine and if my job fires me for refusing the vaccine then I shall quit my current job and go on my photography career instead of scrubbing toilets because I have way too much to offer.

-New York City: Five Borough Tour-

"A photographer is like a cod, which produces a million eggs in order that one may reach maturity." ~ George Bernard Shaw

I had gone on a photography walk in mid October just to help me clear my mind and be in my own reality for several hours before going home. I had gone to Grand Central Terminal to finish up a roll of film that I was already using in Manhattan and the following day, I had gone to Long Island City by the Pepsi Cola sign since it was my first time going to the Pepsi Cola sign. Refer to Pepsi-Cola Sign in Queens Gains Landmark Status on one of several landmarks throughout the Queens area. On my way to the Pepsi Cola sign, there was a film crew shooting a scene for Blue Bloods but didn't stick around long since I didn't know who was in that particular scene since they were shooting a scene at one of those outdoor dining areas. It was still cool as anything and I believe it was either the next day or the following week, I went back to the Pepsi Cola sign, the film crew was there and I got to see Steve Schirripa and (the dude who played Bobby Baccalieri from The Sopranos) and Donnie Wahlberg. I did once some time ago have a dream about Donnie Wahlberg once and I would have approached them for a selfie but I was too shy. I got pictures of them on both phone and on my trusty Minolta X-370. I'd have to either get my Minolta X-370 repaired or invest in another Minolta camera so I can finish my project that I had started originally as a class project in 2013 and passing the class, I want to make this project with no specific deadline. I'll often check with Professor Gordon's Wordpress' for syllabus to see what's good.

"Photographers tend not to photograph what they can't see, which is the very reason one should try to attempt it. Otherwise we're going to go on forever just photographing more faces and more rooms and more places. Photography has to transcend description. It has to go beyond description to bring insight into the subject, or reveal the subject, not as it looks, but how does it feel?" ~ Duane Michals

With my project, I have places  picked out for when I go to Brooklyn between the months of April 1 until September 30. As far as Staten Island is concerned, it will be tricky because I'm unfamiliar with the Staten Island area and I feel like Staten Island will be a challenge since I'm not from there. I hope to find a camera of choice and if in the even that I'm unable to have my Minolta X-370 repaired then I'll consider getting another Minolta camera so the 50mm and zoom lens won't go to waste. I'm considering in having three to four additional film cameras but two of those cameras I will put to use and if in the even that one of the cameras end up being temporarily out of commission then I'd have an extra camera on hand. Two cameras will be for black and white and the other will be for colour. I already have ideas on what I wish to accomplish in the upcoming months and I want to have something that I can be proud of, something that I've created on my own and something that I can show off to people. There's no specific deadline but I want to view this as a personal goal of mine. It's similiar to walking across that stage to accept your college degree at graduation knowing that you've poured every ounce of blood, sweat, and tears into all that work you've put into doing what you have to do. In the end, I'm very much looking forward to seeing the end result of my project and it'll feel like a kid on Christmas morning. Since I have friends who live in Staten Island; the Bronx; Brooklyn; Queens; and a small handful of family who live in Manhattan. I would ask my friends to meet me in each of these boroughs so we can go on photography walks and I'll include them in on my project. I hope to at least work on my project roughly for another eighteen months and towards the end of my project, I'll spend time putting together the book, chapter by chapter. Heck, I'll even add in a preface to my book and I'm very excited about my book. All in all, I hope to speak to my friend, Chris and see if he wants to tag along with me on my photography walks in the upcoming months. I'm going to include at least three links to three of the New York City: Five Borough Tour books for people to have an idea what this project is about.

• New York City: Five Borough Tour - Big City Traces by Nataliya Plusnina
• New York City: Five Borough Tour by: Sirrod Ishhod Crippen
• New York City: Five Borough Tour Through the Eyes of A Warrior by Ricardo Aca

Since winter is around the corner, I hope to have enough funds to get another Minolta camera so I can get back on track of going on my photography walks with my headphones; phone; and portable charger fully charged; with enough film to last me for an entire day. Considering that it's cold outside, I may end up shooting one roll of film but three at most out of five rolls of film.

Blessed be,

Jennifer